I have finally started my journal pages. I am now no longer afraid of the blank page starring at me, I feel that now I can allow myself to let go of my fears and just paint, draw, and sketch, or what ever takes my fancy.
I must explain why this feels like such a big deal to me. For a while now I have felt paralised by the white canvas or page not knowing where or how to begin, but really being afraid of the whole outcome.
Being able to shed this skin has given me so much freedom and calm, I truly feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. The best thing about it is I don't care about he outcome of the work in my journals because the process itself has felt so liberating, a real letting go (which is one of the words I wrote in one of the journal pages). It was so satisfying to let the paint dribble or flick in what ever direction it went without having the self critic come out and create that negative feeling of never being good enough, or not creating enough, or painting like this or that artist.
"What ever!" I say. Let that creative muse out she will show you the way.....;)
Wanted to show you one of my his first pastel drawing in a long time, it was done last year, and it is of my first baby, he is our gorgeous chocolate labrodor who always takes care of us and if we are in any way upset he can tell and he will come and sit by you and lay his head on your lap as if to say, "It's O.K. ".
The pages are written in very small print, but they say:
"I sometime find it hard to TRUST in the process.Creating helps me. Making these journal pages allowed me to LET GO I could flick the paint and let it spill without knowing where it was going. But for some reason I knew and BELIEVED it would all workout. I felt a RELEASE from worries. I EMBRACED this great feeling and allowed myself to just BREATHE and enjoy the process."
The bird is sitting on the tree as its feathers are being blown in the wind, but still the bird sits firm on his perch, knowing where he belongs and looking out into the future soon he will make his plunge into the sky.
Have a great weekend and hopefully creating away without abandon, Angie ox.